S. E. X. Three letters that cause more blushing, embarrassment and giggles than a virgin on a first date. And why is that? Why is talking about something as TOTALLY NATURAL as sex so... unnerving to folks? Why is this subject so taboo? We aren't 10 year olds looking up horny in the dictionary anymore. We are adults. Adults who think about sex. Adults who... wait for it.... HAVE SEX! And if you aren't having sex, more than likely, you wish you were. This isn't the 40's or 50's. It's 2013, and sex is everywhere you look. It's on TV and movies, it's in the ads for your favorite car and perfume, it's in the books we read. It's in music, and not just rap music. Even country stars are singing about it now. We are bombarded with sex, yet it is somehow still whispered about in hushed tones, and treated like a mystery. Well no more!! As of today, I am shouting it from the rooftops. I LOVE SEX, AND YOU SHOULD TOO! Yup, you read that right. I love sex. Love it. Can't get enough of it. And do you want to know what else? I'm not ashamed to say that. Nope. Not even a little bit. I am a happily committed adult female, and I love sex. My hubs and I have an amazing sex life, and that is something I am very proud of. It makes us closer, more intimate and more connected emotionally and physically. And in the 15+ years we have been together, it has only gotten better. Not possible, you say? Yes it is. You want to know how and why? Because we talk about it. Sex has never been a secret subject in our house. We discuss it at length and often. Our likes and dislikes, our fantasies and concerns, all of it. We aren't afraid to try new things, and if something isn't working, we talk about why that is. I am often amazed at couples who can discuss bowel movements, hemorrhoids, and menstruation, but treat sex as something "inappropriate". Wake up people! Sex is a good thing! It's healthy, natural and oh so enjoyable. I 100% believe that you cannot have a truly good and lasting marriage without it. If couples were to be genuinely honest, I'd be willing to bet that sexual related issues (be it lack of, or quality of, etc) are very high on the list of reasons for failed or failing relationships. This needs to end. We need to stop treating sex like the horny elephant in the room. So listen up. Stop blushing and start talking.
*Ladies: It's ok to like sex. This doesn't make you a slut. It makes you a healthy human being, with totally normal desires. As long as you act on those desires in a safe and intelligent manner... rock on. And ladies, stop hating on porn and strip clubs. Don't knock it til you've tried it, ok. You might be surprised. Also, if you don't own one already, go buy a sex toy. I'm serious. They are magical. You can use it alone, or with a partner, and odds are, you won't be disappointed either way. While I'm on the subject... masturbate. Often. This is how you discover what you like and dislike. How can you show or tell a partner what gets you excited if you have no idea yourself. It's your body, learn how it works.
*Guys: You aren't the only ones who enjoy sex. Women do too. A lot. So don't hesitate to initiate it, even when you "think" she might not want it. Worse case, she tells you she doesn't. Best case, she does. Do you get what I'm saying here? Keep in mind, that by initiate, I don't mean ask "So... do you wanna do it?" As romantic as that is (yeah, that was sarcasm) it rarely puts a woman in the mood. Foreplay is crucial for women. There are women who reach full satisfaction from intercourse, but most need more. So spend a little time, and get to know her hot spots. Trust me, it will be worth the effort. Also, ask her what she wants, what she likes, and if there are things she wants to try. There probably are. And don't hesitate to tell her what gets you excited as well. Great sex is a team effort, and both players should be in the game.
*Everyone: There is nothing wrong with talking about sex. If you are too embarrassed to discuss it, you shouldn't be doing it. Plain and simple. Stop making excuses for why you can't or shouldn't be doing it. If you are with a clean and consensual partner, in a healthy situation, have at it. If you are married, or have been together a long time, that's not an excuse to not be doing it either. If you can find or make time for laundry and trash TV, you can make time for sex. If you need a spark, try something new. Go to a nice strip club together, watch some porn, try adding toys to the mix. Maybe you like it a little on the kinky side. That's ok too. If your partner is willing and able... get your freak on. The point it, sex is a good thing. People who have regular sex are happier and healthier overall, and who doesn't want to be happier and healthier??
No comments:
Post a Comment