Drama seekers/creators (AKA: drama llamas, drama queens, etc.) are everywhere. There's at least one in every workplace, family, group, and social circle. You know the type, they are always going on and on about how hard their life is, and how NO ONE could possibly understand what they are going through. They have ZERO perspective, and adamantly seek out situations that they think will garner them attention. From poor choices in relationships, to putting themselves in bad positions, to actively searching for opportunities to cause problems for others and/or themselves.
With the advent of social media, these types have blossomed, and quadrupled in numbers. They now have 24-7 access to a format that allows them to continually beg for attention, and with so many people seeing it, there is bound to be someone to play into it. This feeds the vicious cycle, and before you know it, you are bombarded with a herd of drama llamas.
So what do you do? How do you avoid it? Well, the best way to stay drama free, is to avoid the people who create it. Now this isn't always easy, since as I mentioned, these people are everywhere, and there will be times when you will be forced to deal with them. My best advice in these situations is to remain neutral. When they start with the "poor me" and the "did you hear what he/she did" change the subject. Aim for topics that will be difficult to redirect back to themselves. For example; weather, food, television and movies, etc. Avoid personal subjects, and end the contact as quickly as possible.
Now when it comes to drama queens that you don't HAVE to deal with, avoid them at all costs. Even playing nice can be a mistake, and you can end up sucked into bad situations, and before you know it, you are fully engulfed in their drama, against your will. Oftentimes, it helps to let these people know that you are aware of their games, and to back off. But be warned... they will use ANY situation to their advantage, and try to suck you in using pity, guilt, shame, or by being overly nice, until they get what they want. Which is generally attention. I'm not sure where the constant need for attention comes from. Maybe daddy didn't love them enough, or maybe they were bullied in school. Or maybe they just feel entitled for some reason, and think the world owes them everything, and want constant reassurance of how much better than everyone else they are. I don't know the reasons, I only know I hate it, and will avoid it at all costs. Life is dramatic enough, without voluntarily surrounding yourself with more of it. If 98% of what leaves your mouth, or ends up in your facebook feed, is whiny, needy, negative, melodramatic, or intended to instigate/provoke others... I have no time for you. This isn't to say we don't all have bad days, or occasionally feel the need to vent. But when your occasion is all day, every day... You are a drama seeker/creator, and it's time to get some perspective.
I have found that there are often some obvious signs and red flags for these types of people, and because I care about my readers, I feel compelled to share those things. The following is a list of warning signs that MAY fit overly dramatic types:
1. Very few (if any) close friends, or a constant change in social circles.
2. Too much free time, or a lack of hobbies/interests/jobs/etc.
3. Seeks reassurance on everything.
4. Is always trying to force others to agree with them or take "their side".
5. Rarely has anything positive to say.
6. Thinks they are owed everything, and rarely (if ever) make an effort to do things for themselves.
7. Makes or turns every situation/topic about themselves.
8. Tries to control everything, often because they have something to hide.
9. Overly competitive with others (including friends/family/loved ones) in everyday situations.
10. Inserts themselves into conversations or situations where they don't belong.
These are just a few of the similarities I have found among dramatic people. Some of these traits can be found in non dramatic individuals as well, though generally not multiple ones. Chances are if someone has more than 1 or 2 of these characteristics, they are probably a drama seeker/creator, and you should stay away...
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