I know how much it hurts Dan to see and hear all the commercials and reminders. I know that the only gift he could ever want is one that he will never, ever receive. Having his son back.
Our son took special pride in finding his dad the best gift every year. He spent weeks and sometimes months deciding on the perfect present. How he managed to wait until the actual day, I'll never know, since his excitement was palpable. But wait he did. And then on Father's Day, he would proudly hand that gift over, and watch with wide eyes as his dad opened it. I watched the change from youthful exuberance, to genuine pride as Zach grew older, and began making the purchases with his own money. And I saw the joy and respect in Dan's eyes, as he examined his treasures. It wasn't just about the gifts. It was about seeing his son grow into a caring, selfless, generous young man. It was about knowing that he beat the odds. That after years of hearing all the negative talk about the children of teenage parents, here was this amazing kid that he had raised. An honor roll student. A hard working, kind hearted, respectful individual. A funny, sweet, honest, and compassionate soul. THAT was the best gift of all.
And the most bittersweet...
Zach left us at the tender age of 18. We were just starting to see glimpses of the man he would become. We'll always wonder who he would be today. We'll mourn for not only the loss of our child, but also the man he could have been. The husband, the father, the grandfather, the friend.
But Zach also left behind a legacy. One of kindness. One of generosity. One of humor and light. And that will always remain. No tragic accident could ever steal that. The memories he made, and the happiness he created cannot ever be taken away.
And neither can the love of a father.
When we lost Zach, we lost a part of ourselves that we can never get back. That is a wound that time can never heal. But we also found strength we never knew we had. And an inspiration in the light of the brightest soul to ever have graced this world. And with that inspiration, a father is proving his love. He is carrying on a dream that he shared with his son. Team Finn exists because of that. The courage and tenacity to keep moving forward is the greatest sign of love I've ever seen.
This Father's Day, I know Zach will be smiling with pride as he sees what his dad has accomplished. I know that my son's spirit lives on in everyone who ever knew him, but it is by far the strongest in the man who shares his eyes, and his smile. In the man who is determined to show his son that he will never forget, and never give up. In the father who will love his son for all eternity.
That spirit, that light. THAT is Zach's gift to his dad. This year... and always.
(Father & son)
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