Real Talk: The Joys of Living Together

When you are in a committed relationship, and eventually move in together, there is a flood of excitement and nervousness. You are taking a huge step, and you can't wait to settle in to this new role. Only magic and wonder lie ahead.  
Yeah, yeah. Fast forward a bit...
You've lived together a few years, maybe more. Your lives are utterly intertwined. There is no longer a mine or yours, only ours. And while this is the original intention, and not at all a bad thing, there are several aspects of joint living that we don't really consider, or even notice right away. The hidden truths of living together that no one talks about. Until now.
So for those of you about to take the leap, or for those still in the honeymoon phase... be prepared. Soon enough, your moment of awakening will come.
And for those of you who've been on the ride awhile... hopefully you'll find comfort knowing you're not alone.

1. The Battle of the Bed.
Growing up, you lived in this naïve world, where you believed you would always be able to throw yourself into bed any way you wished, and sleep like Rip Van Winkle. Those days are gone. Now, you've been relegated to one half (if you're lucky) of a bed. And not just any half. Nay. You were forced to choose a side, and sleep on that side for the remainder of your days. I mean sure... you could switch it up, but then what if you woke up in the middle of the night and needed your chapstick? Well, that is in YOUR nightstand, on what feels like the other side of the planet. Or what if you forget that you're no longer on the side nearest the bathroom, and in your sleepy state, accidentally pee in the closet? It's just not worth it. Accept your fate, and stay on your side.

2. Silence is Golden.
Just because you love someone and share a home with them, does not mean that you are always on the same page. Sometimes, one or the other of you will want nothing more than peace and quiet, whilst the other randomly decided that RIGHT THEN is the perfect time to practice their Mariah Carey karaoke jam session. So even though the little crazy voice in your head is screaming "DEAR LORD, SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!" you must suffer in silence. Yes silence, that word that your darling roomie clearly does not know the meaning of.

3. Umm, excuse me. I'm in here.
Don't waste your breath with those words. They know you are in there. They just don't care. Privacy is a thing of the past. You will now always have company when you bleach your mustache, shower, and empty your bladder. Because obviously, that is the perfect time to discuss everything. Oh, and scoot over, they also need to clip their toenails or trim their nose hair right this very second. It doesn't matter that there is another, perfectly functional bathroom they could use. Nope, you're a team now. You do all things together. Yay.

4. Closet Space.
Here's the deal. I don't care what any real estate agent or fancy home listing says. Unless your home has been featured on an episode of MTV Cribs, you will NOT have enough closet space in your master bedroom. No bedroom closet was ever properly designed for two adults to share. I don't care how big it looks, it will not be big enough. Someone is going to have to keep their shit in another room, or accept 30% of their allotted space. And yes, I DO need all of those shoes.

5. The Great Debate.
Ok, so you love each other. For better or for worse. Fine. But you are never, ever, ever going to agree on everything. Whether it is how to properly put on a roll of toilet paper (It's always over, by the way. Always.) how to squeeze the toothpaste, fold a hand towel, or load the dishwasher.... there will be at least one thing that you eternally disagree on. You may compromise, but you will never get over it. Your way is the right way, and that's all there is to it.

6. But that was mine!
There will come a time when you find yourself huffing like a pissed off toddler who refuses to share and saying "Stop taking/using my shit!" Regardless of how well you think you hid that box of your favorite cookies, or how many times you point out which razor is yours. I know, I know.... there is no MINE or YOURS. But really... that was MY donut. I was saving it. And that shampoo you used... that was mine too.

7. You'll Never Be Lonely Again.
Living with someone is not always easy. You will bicker over trivial things, you will wonder how someone so adorable can make a room stink so bad, and you will probably day dream about what it would be like to live alone every so often. But you will NEVER be lonely again. Even when you think all you want is alone time, when they aren't there, you will find yourself listening intently for the sound of their key in the door. You will lie next to them at night and know that the bed would just feel so big and empty without them. (something you'll have to remind yourself of when the snoring starts) You will form habits together, and become a real team. You will share things you never expected to share, and you will be all the better for it. THAT is the real truth.